More Poems by S. L. Wilhoit

Sammie Lee Wilhoit is a Professional Writing major at Champlain College. She writes poetry to pinpoint feelings and to capture her experiences in glass jars. Her work has been published in The Clementine Zine and In Parentheses. Her Instagram is @sammiewilhoit and Twitter is @exhaletheatre.

Artwork by Margaret Wiss

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Ars Poetica in Car

I pulled in
1-2-3-4-5-6-7
Breathe, breathe!

I coughed and coughed
bent over the front seat
my throat burned
like a molten rake had
scraped down it.

Want some water?
Max handed me a water bottle
from the passenger seat.
That was a long pull.

Do you feel heavy?
Asked Ethan.

I blinked
and sunk back into the
worn-out gray cushioned
seats of the Toyota,
backpacks pressed against my
right leg and arm

My whole body tingled and
got heavier
The edges of my vision fogged

My vision felt sharper and moved
both faster and slower
voices were deep.

I licked my bottom lip.
My tongue felt funny
like another tongue had
slid into my mouth when
I wasn’t looking

Oh fuck. She is out of it.
Laughed Max. He asked
Ethan for a pull off of that
big fat bong and as he reached
over they kissed and I watched
with awe and amusement.

Max corrected Ethan for kissing
with his lips puckered inward and
they tried again. After which,
Max took a hit.
Then another.
Then another.
clicking the sparkwheel
between each 3-second pull.

I was on the Magic School Bus
suspended in space.
The walls of the car crushed in
on either side and my head buzzed

I breathed shallow breaths until Max
asked what I needed and I told him to
turn on familiar music.

Within minutes,
I was softly singing and Max
and Ethan looked at each other and
laughed.

When I closed my eyes,
their outlines appeared
light green silhouettes against a
Green-and-yellow
tie-dyed
background.

Synesthesia,
I whispered in my brain
letting the word taste sour
on my tongue.

Behind Closet Doors

He needs space, I said
patting the carpet next to me.

Ethan crouched down.
He twisted off the metal lid
of the smiling lemon
glass and sipped the pink liquid.

The moonlight blended with the streetlights
to provide dim lighting through a small window

It feels nice being small,
I leaned against the dresser
and tucked my legs against
my chest.

I think Max needs to be alone.
Could you close the closet door?

Ethan set his glass on top
of the dresser behind me
and walked over to the closet
Closing the door softly.

You look so hot.
I’ve been wanting you all night.
He hunched over me and kissed me
lifting up my shirt.

His touch grounded me from the dizzy world
and I held him close

Wait
Aren’t the condoms in the bedroom?
Shouldn’t
we
get them?

It’s okay, baby.
He took off my pants and
lowered his,
his small hairy ass aglow
in the moonlight.

He thrust into
my dry desert
and I cringed each time

Kissed and thought about
how angry and jealous Max
would be that we fucked in
his closet.

Fuck, Ethan spat as
applesauce slid out and down my thighs

I cracked the door ajar
and slowly opened it
expecting Max to yell or look shocked
as cum ran down my legs

Instead, he was lying on the bed staring
at the high ceiling.
He looked over and saw me as I teetered with soggy thighs
Ethan gazed down and
Max knew.

He gently but firmly told Ethan to leave,
had me go to bathroom and then
held me close in his arms

Made me promise never to smoke weed again.

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